Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?

There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

-
I couldn't help it but to listen to 'HURT' on repeat mode, and I realised that no matter how much I hate my dad, deep inside I still love him very much despite the harshness he used on me every now and then.
I can't help reminiscing the days when my dad held me so tight like a precious gem, never wanna let me fall down and hurt myself, and making me look like a doll each time he wore this cute red beanie on my head.

I know he's disappointed in me.
I've changed so much till he didn't recognize me as his daughter anymore.
He was upset over the fact that I lied, drink, only coming home past midnight and much more.
Flunked my O's.
Not becoming a dutiful and religious daughter.

I spent the entire day crying in bed, accompanied by my loyal cat Joyah whose bulu never fails to fluff out to the max due to the extreme relaxation / cold.