Oh.. sunggoh riang-nya di hati-ku..

Selekeh-ed.
I'm gonna define that.

I was clad in my black YA t-shirt which is one size too big and a pair of butt-compressing jeans with a pair of black 'market' slippers, with a hairstyle like as if a mini tornado had swept sections of my hair into a dozen directions and minimal concealer + super big urge to sleep, which means a pair of conspicuously huge eyebags which apparently, my minimal concealer can't help to conceal. Ironic. Oh let's just spare a thought for the concealer, I only applied a bit.

MALU sia going out like that.

I looked like a wayward. Okay maybe not. There's a little bit of exaggeration there.

Anyway that's it lah. (:

I heard the phone ringing, and I was in the bathroom when I distinctively heard Younger Sis yelling to Younger Bro, "KAKAK MENA TENGAH MANDI LAH!!" (Sis Mena is bathing.) I suppose it was a call for me.

I thought it was Bestie so I thought I will call her back later. Meanwhile I texted Di, and a few minutes later I received a call from him. I was contemplating whether to answer the call, cos he was still in class. So I did.

Me: "Hello?"
Di: "YOU! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!! HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY, DEAR!!"
Me: -dumbfounded-

I had this mental picture that he was hiding behind the class cupboard to call me. Pak Sanggup!

Me: "I love you too dear." *all smiles*

He couldn't make it to see me at 1.40pm cos he needs to go back to straight. So my heart sank for a while but I just replied with, "Oh okay. Sure then." But it LIT UP after he said, "But I can make it at 4pm or at night. I don't care. I must see you today. And die-die I'll call you after school. Message me first."

My heart swooned. Never had I felt so loved so rabak like this before.

Nevertheless I was touched cos he actually risked himself being caught red-handed by his teacher just to call me.

Anyways,

Happy 1st year anni to us. Love you love you la, my dear irritating sheep.

I can't believe it is already one year for us, and counting. My longest relationship so far.


ANDDD..

Happy 6th months anni to AMIRA AND QAMALLL!! a.k.a MOMOK AND MOKMOK!!

(:

Happy day today, isn't it? I'm feeling so light, I feel like going out to smell the fresh air and enjoy the scenery of beautiful flowers and the green grass and chase the butterflies and kiss the ground....... but I can't cos on this happy day I'm actually down with a nasty chill all over my body and I'm having a merciless backache- all this started yesterday, when I starved myself till afternoon and then broke the starvation spell with Tom Yum instant noodle in a cup (with cuzzie who's not supposed to eat that cos she's sick, but eventually she did and her condition worsened) and then our uncle treated us and both our aunties to Qi Ji (pronounced as CHI-CHI, but I remained on the KI-JI) to eat the famous popiah basah (direct translation= WET POPIAH) and Sweet and Spicy tahu goreng and then iced milo. Tell me, with all these unhealthy food (bringing the F&N out in me) to start a day, you would have possibly died from inappropriate consumption and I had a nasty tummy ache but I endured it cos I wanted to sit down on the couch for 2 hours just for the sake of 'Dia'.



Spoiler.

CLUBBING DOK...

GEREKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!

I was raised in a family where dancefloor music from the stereo filled the atmosphere in the house, and Dad introduced Michael Jackson to me during my initial years. Dad then bought the original music video cd of Michael Jackson. I grew up liking the songs by him- and among my top favourites are 'Billie Jean', 'Smooth Criminal' and 'Remember the time'. I spent my free time gyrating and synchronizing to the hot beats and awesome dance steps of Michael Jackson, imitating my young moonwalks and the waist-hurting moves.

I vividly recalled a time when Mom joined me to watch the music videos, and when 'Beat It' was played, Mom danced madly to the song, imitating Michael Jackson's moves, and I was laughing my ass off because she looked funny when attempting to do the complicated moves. In the end she was down with a fever on the following day. Since then she never danced like Michael Jackson anymore.

In the following years, 'Smooth Criminal' was techno-tized by another rock band, Alien Ant Farm. I was pretty disgusted by the modernized song because I was practically worshipping Michael Jackson and kinda boycotted the 'imitations'. And then, teens crazed over the new modernized version when I preferred the original one. And when I mention to them that 'Smooth Criminal' is originally sung by Michael Jackson, they fended it off and claimed that Alien Ant Farm's version are nicer and 'ROCKINN'. I nearly smashed their faces.

Today, Dad relived my childhood by playing back Michael Jackson's music video cd. The whole family was sitting down and watching the videos and awed by the smooth moves of Michael Jackson. I was momentarily detached from my recent world and saw myself standing a few inches away from the tv and dancing madly to the songs. And when 'Beat It' was played, my sister and I pestered Mom to dance again with Sis saying, "I think if you dance now, you'll end up in the hospital for 30 days." but Mom replied, "That was years ago when I danced, but at this old age, I'll prolly not wake up anymore." And we burst out laughing.

When Dad decided to stop playing the music video cd, Younger Bro whined. Mayn that boy, in discreet he actually like Michael Jackson! Well, which child won't, knowing the fact that Michael Jackson's moves are awesome, and I can sense that Younger Bro is sharing the same interest as me- liking Michael Jackson. He's growing up in a childhood just like mine.

But look at Michael Jackson now. His life is in a mess. His negativity is being exposed to the media. But let's just hope that he shall relive his old moments once again, cos this little soul in me has been admiring him since the first music video clip that she watched- nearly a decade ago.

To the KING OF POP.

ISWANDI? ISWANDI? ISWANDI?

Oh that irritating fat sheep who calls me fat eh? Hahah okay as a punishment I won't be seeing you for ONE WEEK okay? Now don't complain.

Oh oh, and you're one irritating bastard cos you miss called me today at 6.43 A.M and it shocked the hell out of me. A.M, people, A.M!!I was abruptly jolted out from my beauty sleep by your IRRITATING MISS CALL. So an additional 3 days of not seeing you. So altogether I won't see you for 10 days. Okay? (:

Irritate me somemore lah dear! Then I'll happily add, add and add. Heheh.

My contact lenses are being a pair of bitches today. Went to inter to pay Mom's bills which bores me to the zenith with the queues and the walks from one point to another. At the traffic light I bumped into a pair of mamats and one of them kept asking me where am I going, and naturally I gave him the I-don't-understand-whatcha-talkin-about-cos-I-don't-speak-Malay kind of look with one eyebrow raised so when he got the message, he gave up and teased me for being snobbish. "Sombong eh.." This time I totally ignored that mamat. So I went to the nearest mosque to do my afternoon prayers.

Later at 3.45pm I'm gonna fetch Younger Sis from school and then meet up with Mom at inter again to settle the spoiled home theater speakers for warranty and then, maybe getting me a new pair of flats, IF there is my size there. Cos these delicate and pretty flats normally have stocks up to size 7, which I totally find it degrading to myself cos I have a pair of feet with size 9. NORMALLY size 9. But surprisingly I can nicely fit into my Mom's flats which is an appaling size 7, so I think my feet are suffering from personality disorder cos it can fit into any footwear of different sizes. They must be confused, ey? 7, 8 or 9? But typically they're size 9. OH FUCKIN 9.

Now I should go and get a power nap. But I think my power nap will overshot. So I think I'll drink 5 million cups of Nescafe to keep my eyes open.

After nearly a century, I finally realised that..

Angelina Jolie is super hot.

Having burgers for almost everyday for breakfast is boring me. If last time I used to dream to have finger food for breakfast like french fries or burgers or any package from McDonald's/Burger King/LJS, now I think I will eat my words up. I've had my dream came true. I'm growing sick of these sickly food. Burgers- doesn't whet my 'unhealthy' appetite anymore. Oh and remember, be careful of what you wish for. It might always come true.

I'm like, plagued with tons of housework today. Wash the clothes, fold the laundry, sweep the house, TIDY UP MY PIGSTY-LOOKALIKE-ROOM and etc etc. At night I will meet up with sis at the hospital and then to religious class at 9 pm. Ah there goes my chance to watch Mr & Mrs Smith today. Freagggin iddiot.

What date is today? Pardon me, but the long term of becoming a pre-housewife had corrupted my mind and I already feel like I'm not a student anymore.

I thought back of what had happened today, and I am deeply appreciated by what Di had done for me. All starting from asking him to come over despite his exhaustion from a long day at school, but my irritating whinings and persuasion finally made him give in to me, everytime, over everything. Even to the extend of dragging him to the hospital and making him sit down at the lounge area to wait for me for more than his patience could tolerate, and forcing him to pretend not to know me whenever he sees me with the presence of my relative. If you're wondering why I dragged him along, pardon me, that was a last minute thing. I had to do both. But that's not all. It was already late for him, he had to go, but I made him stay with me until the time passed beyond his curfew. After I realised that I need to fetch my sister, then I finally let him go. I mean, hey, I was being very mean. He's like, a sacrifice. A sheep sacrifice.

Don't worry. I'll repay.

After so long... (:

Mom is cooking the sambal for Nasi Lemak and I've been salivating like a mad dog for the past 10 minutes. But the funny thing is I don't feel like eating it at all. Just the smell, the aroma, is enough to drive my nostrils crazy. Okay that sounds so wrong.

Oh I'm so sad that I didn't cut off Amira's 38D boobies today because they were too big and my knife blade couldn't make it through all the way down. I'm so sad, I was about to cook it with lemak cili padi and let Qamal and Amirul taste my cooking. Thank you for calling me a cannibal, I take that as a compliment.

I like it when every end of an argument leads to a happy ending and then, a closer bonding. Be it my boyfriend, my mom, my sis, my friends, Hannie, my victim of cannibalism (OH IT'S YOU LA AMIRAAAA. DON'T APPEAR OFFLINE ALWAYS OKAY) and even my dad.

But most of the time it's with Di. Cos he's an irritating motherfocker who never fails to irritate the shit out of me. But no matter how irritating focker he could be, he's always my irritating sheep. Okay.

Anyway he was so happy like a kid who is given a lollipop because he successfully captured our silly antics on video using his camera phone just now. I swear the look on his face is worth a reported US$1 billion.

So short. So sleepy. So tired.

I'm so happy and I can't wait. Tomorrow Amira shall lose her boobies, cos I'm going to cut them off. And she shall be flat-chested for the rest of her life. I'm sharpening my knives now.

so sick.

Dah that's it. I'm hooked to 'SO SICK' by Ne-yo. I know this song is like, light years ago but heck.

Tuition was o-kay. My tutee was laughing and laughing at my crazy antics. I don't know why, but today I'm all so hyped. Cuzzie sang 'Sinaran' and then the other crazy-ness started. We were singing and dancing madly in the streets and near the road, and unsurprisingly we received eons of honkings from passing vehicles and a few stares from passer-bys.

So we had lunch at Changi Village. I miss ABU seh! Hahah ABU TAU-SI! He's like, so cute seh! Okay what's up with this 'seh' thing. BTW Abu is my aunt's stall helper. Anyway there is a new stall helper to replace my other aunt. Okay la, Kak Farah. Very the mysterious. And we saw a cockroach lingering around this man's collar without him knowing about it. I nearly died.

Soon after lunch I met up with Di. He brought along his irritating guitar, which gradually irritated me so I irritated him further by irritatingly place my palm on the strings while he was strumming the irritating guitar and hence, no sound was produced. I like. Then he forced me to play the guitar, so I did, but then he took a video of it without my knowledge. I nearly whacked his head with his guitar okay. Both of us were like, fighting over the phone, I wanted to delete the video so badly, but he refused, I was on top of him and this uncle just passed by and gave us this dirty stare. Once again, I wished I could like, just die there.

And he irritated me further by playing my voice recording on repeat mode. I was so surprised when I found out that he recorded my singing without my consent when we were on the phone last night. So I intended to smash his phone, oh like real.

But then I havta go. The short meet-up was pretty 'fruitful', if such word is appropriate. Anyway it's doubly irritating too cos he couldn't get his hands off my butt. Always smacking it whenever he has the opportunity. And then I told him that I have a dick and my dick is actually bigger than his. That's when he officially called me dirty-minded. Oh like as if he's not. Lol.

He sent me to the bus stop. The moment the first 66 came, I got up to leave. But he started whining like a young child. So I had to let pass the bus and decided to board another one. But the moment the second 228 came, he pulled a long face. So I didn't board it. The third 60 came, it was getting prettay late, and coincidentally his mom called. So this time I went for the bus. LOL. If not this boy will detain me longer.

So I went studying. I nearly wracked my brains. Oh so sorry, my brains. I don't mean to hurt you. Take your time to process every ounce of information from now on okay? I need you to work so I can get good grades for my coming 'O's. Please?

Oh I'm so talkative today. Now I shall raid the cupboard and get myself a cup of hot Milo.

Embah shifted to another ward. This time the new ward is air-conditioned, lesser patients, more caring nurses, and my aunts this time will not need to overnight with Embah anymore because the nurses at this ward are more patient-friendly and will do constant check-ups on the patients. Which means, fatter bills.

Left the hospital at around 7.15pm. Mom and I rushed to Khatib to visit my cousin who just gave birth to her 2nd child last week. The MRT was inhumanly packed, and Younger Sis had no space to turn around so she had to remain standing at the same angle and direction, which in her case, was facing this man's dick, who at the same time was just opposite me. So throughout the journey she was all along facing the man's dick. I nearly died.

Had to wait for Sis and my other cousins before we finally went up to the house. I was stoning throughout the one-hour ordeal because I was simply very tired and sleepy, and I had to depend on incredibly thick layers of concealer and foundation to cover my mercilessly huge eyebags that has been guarding my eyes since morning. In the bus on the way home, I managed to snatch a few minutes of sleep, trying hard to endure every torturous minute before finally reaching home.

I'm so sick today and the day is scorching hot, I'm feeling so lazy to go out. Hmm.

Now I really can't help it but to rant because my mom's mouth has been working like a 24-hour clockwork and I find it really irritating and annoying.

______________

Okay it's nearing 7 pm now. I need to take a shower and then off to the hospital. Till then.

Had a tiff with Di. Cos I told him that I saw this chinese guy whom I had a huge massive crush on at the bus stop. And he stopped talking to me. When the bus that I wanted to board arrived, he leaned over and wrapped an arm around me, intending to kiss me but I just shoved him away, and walked towards the bus without turning back. At night we texted for a while but he was still being so irritating so today I shall not call or text him.

SHEESH. It's so humid around here these days, eh? RAAAH. I hate it when the day is scorching hot and the level of humidity is increasing, and it makes me feel so lazy to go out. UNBEARABLE. Dah that's it I'm going to take my 2nd shower now.

No, there is a huge difference between 'kawan' and 'sahabat'.

Though both mean 'friends', but 'sahabat' refers more to the 'special friend' rather than 'kawan'. If you read any sajak or puisi written to a friend, they normally use 'sahabat' because it pictures a stronger bond between the writer and his/her friend. Whereas 'kawan' is more to casual friends or acquaintances.

So, in life we can have a lot of 'kawan-s', but you can hardly find a 'sahabat'.

NOW YOU GEDDIT, AMIRUL?

I'M WHINING LIKE FUCK.
SORRY LAH I CAN'T HELP IT.

woooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwww

I was singing out loud when halfway, I started to break down and cry.

But as soon as the chorus part came, I started to feel alive and rocked and jammed like nobody's business. And I swear at that point of time my Younger Bro and Younger Sis were watching me from behind, staring at me like as if I'm a martian who landed out of nowhere.

I swear I miss you a lot. I don't know why. I know I shouldn't feel this way. It's vair vair wrong. Entirely wrong.
Whenever you're online, I have this vair vair big urge to nudge you and then run away. We used to talk a lot few months back. We were so happy, so crazy. And suddenly it's like, gone. Like, totally gone.
But when you pm-ed me at MSN, I PRETEND I don't care. I PRETEND I'm not at all excited. I PRETEND to be as cool as a cucumber. BUT NO. My heart could have just leapt out involuntarily and hop all the way to London. But when you bid goodbye, I pretend to be nonchalant. But deep inside I went childish and pleaded not to leave me alone in this cyber shit. So I went offline as soon as you went offline, cos MSN will be just a DeadSpace for me even though there's a number of others pm-ing me.
I NEVER forget your calls. I was secretly jumping for joy whenever your voice greeted me once I picked up the receiver. But I managed to keep a friendly and calm voice throughout the call. I have never felt this elated before. Most of the time, as soon as we ended the call, my sister will witness my 5 minutes of over happiness and then crazy-ness followed by crap-piness before I finally cool down and then got back to my normal self.
I know you're not aware about all of these. Each time I listen to that song, I will go teary and stuff.
But now the problem is, I'm vair vair shy. I will never make the first move, I'll just wait even till my cats grow blue whiskers.

I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
I hate Siemens SX 1.
Cos I friggin' hate it.

i'm growing blue whiskers

I'm two quarters and a heart down
And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds
These words are all I have so I'll write them
So you need them just to get by


Sis and I are sharing the same wrath. Over SX 1. Ditch 'em.
And people, I know you must be wondering why the sudden change in me, considering I've damned the 2 girls to the extreme in the previous post, let me tell you. I make mistakes too. No one's perfect. Including me lah. Obviously.

unwrap it all.

I was very surprised myself. Over the fact that I just known about 5 hours ago.

FACT;
Sharifa Amalia and Nisa (minus Pregnant lah, okay) are two good girls. And I mean it lah.

Now stop gasp-ing, people.
I know you're asking me WHY, cos previously I've been damning them and framing them publicly.

Now let me tell you why..



Cos they're nice people, contrary to your first negative impressions towards them, esp Amalia. I was incredibly shocked when she called me and the next thing I know, we were giggling and bitching like we've known each other for years. Her standard 'whaTeverrrrrrr!' has this funny tone which cause me to burst out laughing like mad. Then we were talking about this someone and bitching and damning that particular someone. And then the next thing we were talking about O's and pure Geography. Okay at this point of time you must have thought that I've gone mad. But seriously NO! She's nice lah. Totally the opposite of what I thought about her, especially since I learned that she's a tv girl. Then came the shocking conference and blah blah blah, and oh! I love you lah my deer! HAHA okay inside joke! Then at night she called me again and asked me whether I wanna come down and join her with Nisa and all, but sadly I couldn't join, knowing the fact that I'm not allowed to go out at night, or let's put it this way, at ALL. Okay? Haha some other time uh girl!

And I missed out Nisa too. I called her in the evening and she was all bubbly and happy, so I became equally bubbly and happy too. So the thing went on smoothly and she's okay with it.

Sheesh. Looks are certainly deceiving now. From today onwards I must not judge a person based on his/her looks. Cos even the most minah-est/Ah Lian-est/mat-est/Ah Beng-est stranger can actually be 1574831571045 times nicer than the nicest person in the world.

I learned my lesson.

FLU MACHINE.

Like the title says, I'm down with a nasty flu now. I'm having a voice of a rocker, just waiting for the cue to perform. Wanna listen? Okay call 1800-YOU-ARE-DUMB now. I'll be singing Only One by Yellowcard.

Eh fuck la. Talk shit la.

Yesterday I STUDIED at the hospital okay. STUDIED. Omg. Cuzzie can't stop worrying about me. She was mugging Physics and Malay and I studied Physics. Okay uh. Embah SMILED and WAVED at me! I was so happy like fuck. The moment I got home, I showered and put on my Powerpuff Girls pyjamas to commemorate Amira's birthday.

So today I woke up and did my housework. Cos at 3 plus I'm going off to the hospital.

Hmm, for the past one week I've been going to the hospital everyday, non-stop. Tired? Yeah. Till I fall sick, HELLO!

But do I care? No.

Okay need to fold the laundry now.

BIG MOMMA'S BIRTHDAY!

[edited]

You know, one thing to discontinue being angry with your boyfriend is to recall something funny that he/both of you did.

In this case, I recalled a time where we were chilling at his place, and I applied mascara on his eyelashes. And then I fell off the chair, laughing like a mad shit.

anyway..


BIIGGG MOMMMAAA IS IN THA HOUSE!!

BIG MOMMA AMIRA!!!!!!!!

HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY MOMMA!!

Dear Momma, I love you very much. I love you. I love you. You're my bestest Momma as well as my loyal girlfriend. I LOVE YOU! Today you're gonna spend your day with Mr Momok, so you MUST have a good day okay? SPEND THE DAY FRUITFULLY. WE MUST MEET UP NEXT WEEK. I don't CARE. I'LL RUNAWAY FROM HOME IF I HAVE TO! PROMISE! (:

THIS APPLIES TO HANNIE THE BUNNY TOO! HANNIE IF YOU'RE READING, PLEASE TAG!

May God bless you with a good life ahead! (:


On the other hand, I'm always so used to getting what I want. And this refusal/"rejection" totally sends me off to the edge.

btw I love GOH AMMJAYS. Only she knows why. (:

f!@#$% you

Am I thaatttt tall? For two consecutive days I have been complimented by strangers about my tall height at the age of 17! And there they goes, moaning about how shhoorrttt they are and wishing they're as tall as me. Like hello? I actually want to be short, do you know that? I wish I'm at least 1.60m or something? I feel so.. alienated, as if I belong to a world where tall people are seen as the result of a wrong-ed experiment from Planet X. BAHHH! I wanna wear HEELS, okay? Heels look sexy under a pair of Levi's. BUT I CAN'T WEAR THOSE. COS I'M TALL. OKAY? Now hear my dilemma. Sheesh. Oh, shorty!

_________________

I guess now I'm not in the correct state of health, and mind. Puked out all the Nasi Sambal Goreng and remains of Nasi Padang I had this morning. My tummy WON'T FREAKING ACCEPT anything that I eat! I'm having a bit of light-headedness now, and I'm gonna like, rush to the hospital soon. Cuzzie's are out at school, but I know my Sec 1 cuzzie, Razi, finishes sch at 10.15am today cos he's having only his English and History paper today. Ahh, memories. Exams!


It'll take time for me to build my trust back on you. I'm rather disappointed, judging from what others say about you, talk about you, LABEL you. Do you REALLY stick to ONE? Upset lah dey. I know I shouldn't get too carried away by those. But still.. I feel like I'm livin in a shadow of someone else. I feel so used, I feel like I'm a love fool. Or is it just me? Oh, freak why am I writing such a melancholic note like this. This is sooo not me. I'm not gonna write this any further. But, oh shut up, idiot. Okay stop it.

worried sick.

I have lost my appetite. Have been eating only a meal a day, or not eat at all. Forced myself to eat most of the time. This morning I was left alone at home to do the housework, and then Sis called me from Alfiah and asked me to go downstairs to eat. She was already there and was waiting for me. So when I went to mirror to tidy up, I was beyond appalled to see an incredibly pale face looking back at me. Vair vair pale. I must have looked like a zombie in the broad daylight. Then I had a craving for Nasi Sambal Goreng, but then when Sis went to the mama shop to buy it, there was none left.

Had to resort to Red Bull for temporary energy charge, but I nearly puked when I was in the lift.

The house is always in a mess, the kids are fucking irritating and are always making a lot of noise, I'm getting beyond stressed and there's no one for me to lend a shoulder for me to rant.

I'm feeling so restless and helpless. I wanted to tell Di about this that had been agitating me, but he gave me no chance cos he was continuously talking about his bro's accident, and I had to keep mum about it. So I had to end the call early to give me a little space. Anyway he has already broken up with that motherfucking bitch, so at least there was one burden lifted off my shoulder.

Maybe I'm too worried sick about Embah's condition. But on top of it, I've been thinking about a lot stuffs lately. I'm down under the wheel at the moment.

I will be going to the hospital again later in the evening, as soon as Mom gets back home from her visit to Embah, cos apparently there's no one there to look after her (except for the nurses) as my other aunt who had stayed overnight has gone home to recharge and others will be coming in the late evening.

too much.

[edited]

*oh, pictures added!


Just got back from the hospital. Rushed there as soon as I'm done with my tuition. Embah's relying on feeding tube. She was in daze all day long. She responded by turning to your direction if you call her name. A heart-wrenching sight. But she's 20% better now. I'm relieved.

Karisma nurse? Oh, hot. Sab and I nearly died there.

Now I'm at home, resting. Will take my shower then do my prayers, after that get changed then my sister and I will be going to the hospital again, as soon as Mom gets back home from her visit to Embah, maybe in the late evening.

I'm exasperated. But what to do.... my love for Embah can never be ceased.

__________________

Browsed through my old Photobucket account. Found myself laughing alone while looking at the pictures, taken last year, when I was in Bedok Green, with two bestfriends who went through my major ups and downs with me, Hannie and Mira. (:



Amira used to love my nostrils so much. Most of the pictures in the album are mainly Amira, always trying to stuck her finger up into my nostrils. This is the best shot, as the others have my face looked unbearably ugly cos there was at least her finger trying to make its way into my nostrils- expanded.



Catfight. I missed, pulling her hair which resembled the long, dry straws of the broom. We had our hair rebonded at the same time.



Amira loved middle fingers.



At that time she was head over heels on me. Oh, my Cleopatra hair.



Amira's fingers loved to make their way into those nostrils.



And those silly faces.



Then Hannie came into the picture- literally.



Hannie's as sweet as suga.



And she loves me too!

.

I proposed to her. With a paper flower.



R.E.T.R.I.B.U.T.I.O.N. The name that was scrawled to any property which belongs to us.



Room raider raiding Amirul's room. BUSTED!



They got sayang-ed.



Vainity brought us so far. Till Pantene Hair Moisturiser follows Hannie to school everyday.



Hannie's happiness.



Eeeeevil.



My hair WAS that short.



End of BG picies. End of our time. But we're still together. Love you girls. (:

him. and her.

Omagod this is so touching I can just cry now. And fill up 892475215742097123 pails.

Stole this from -rrayn's blog.

"pheromones.(shh. mariyanah doesn't know what this is.)
that attracts girls to me. [=

and i went home.
only to sleep.
and i wake to use msn messenger.
and mariyanah's online.
great?
yeah. she's someone i can relate to.
a future shadow? maybe.
and she's a dictionary a version more advanced than me.

well that's all so farr.
signing off.
LCP -rrayn/ ryann?"


You taught me two new words today.
Ditto?
And that phero-whatever word.

____________________

Di.
He's lookin so fine. So f!@#$%^ hot. I couldn't resist. I could have died.

He dragged me all the way to Banquet to satisfy his craving for carrot cake. That was before he havta rush off for NCC. To get his promotion. Woo. He got promoted to 1st sergeant. But I wasn't surprised. Knowing his kemarok-ness for NCC. His PASSION for NCC. He will NEVER EVER skip any NCC training even if he's freaking sick. DIE DIE MUST GO. Nevertheless I'm quite happy for him. Too proud for him, to be exact. Prettay envious of him, actually. Oh boy, he's my guy.

So when the clock strucked 3.15pm, ding dong, Cinderella havta go. Took 17. Couldn't take my eyes off him. Too hot la, he even scalded me. Oh goodbye, he will alight from the bus two stops ahead. Farewell. His breath still had the thick traces from the cigarette which he smoked earlier on after his lunch. Not that I mind, though. So our mouths exchanged breath. And there he go, he alighted, and left me alone. And we made funny faces with the window as our barrier.

But beneath this calm facade, I was feeling completely bitter inside.

Today, Embah (a Javanese term for granny) was admitted to hospital.
When Mom broke the news to me, I felt like as if the whole world has crashed down on me.
She fell down, and suffered a blood clot in her right brain.
Her right arm and leg were numb.
It was a pitiful sight.
I was crashing inside, the moment I stepped into the ward. But I refuse to let the tears fall. In the end, I failed to hold it back.
It was only yesterday night that she called my home, greeting me with her cheerful and bubbly voice.
She was very frail. And vulnerable.
My most favourite granny.
And this is so unexpected.


Embah,
I will promise to stay by your side. With every strength and free time I have, I will always be next to you.


I don't wanna lose the one I love. After today, things are not gonna be the same again. I'm going to spend all my free time now with her, no matter what happens. And this is possible, considering I'm slacking like a motherfucker now. A full-time slacker.

not good enuff.

[edited]

*new stuffs added*


I ponder. MSN convo with somebody whose identity shall not be disclosed. Let's just say, an acquaintance of mine.



Boy 'X' says:
are u mix??
I say:
nope. why?
Boy 'X' says:
u look like a chinese



Wooots. DO I?

_________________________

Double shit. I'm gonna let out a secret. Let a cat out of the bag. Oh you most-priveleged readers, you're the only ones who will know it. Even this secret is hidden from my boyfriend. Oh kill me.

I'm having a massive crush on somebody else. Shit. Is this wrong? Oh move on. Let me tell you more. He's a bit goofy, I'm afraid. But he's HOT. Haawwwwwttttttttt. He's cute. Oh no, hot and cute don't go together, but.. okay he's an exception. Unbearably adorable. My heart thumps like a banging disco track whenever I caught a glimpse sight of him. A daily half-an-hour of him is never enough. I wish it never ends. Yeah, I kept this from my boyfriend. It has been going on since last year. All behind his back.

Sheesh. He's quite popular, I suppose. Most of you know him. Really. Pardon me for saying this. He's.......

RON STOPPABLE!




Tune in EVERYDAY to KIM POSSIBLE at 6pm on DISNEY CHANNEL! And watch Ron Stoppable in action!



Oh Ron Stoppable, hear this desperate cry, BE MINE!

_________________________

Shit. I was supposed to copy and paste an extract from an MSN convo with -rrayn. There was a war with words concerning our current status we are in. Shit cos I accidentally exited the window. I really wanted to copy and paste that section here. Curses.

_________________________

Suddenly I have a huge hit for Cookies & Cream or Rocky Road. I have this enormous strength to dig up my savings and run down to the nearby NTUC and get a big tub or two, but my butt feels like it has been permanently glued to the seat. Oh, farewell Cookies and Cream or Rocky Road.

At this moment, I'm feeling very demoralised. I'm feeling very stupid and feel like a complete crap inside.

Cos yesterday I lied to myself.

_________________________

[edited/]

So you got a bentley, got a lot of money
Every girl's your honey, excuse me
I'm not that type of lady..